Dream Bigger

Poem excerpted with permission from two previous authors and personalized by Karin….

We dreamed of raising one of each
A son and a daughter to love and to teach
A barren womb was God's design
I wept for the children who would never be mine.

After seven long years, a son He brought
Through the miracle of adoption, ‘far above our thoughts’
We rejoiced in the God who turned tears to joy
As we treasured each day with our sweet baby boy.

Four years later, God added another
And our oldest son had a new baby brother
My heart yearned for a daughter, but I thought we were through
"Dream Bigger, " God said, "I have a girl for you."

A prayer was said, with our hearts bowed low
"Send us, Lord, where you want us to go'
Our third child was found in a far away land
And as He had promised, God held our hand.

Later, God's call was low, sweet and clear
There is one more child for you to hold dear
'Your daughter is born in a distant land
I've chosen you as part of her plan."

Just home from China, and God spoke again
A little one waits, I promise you can
Be her Mama and Dada…stretch your hearts wide,
I will help you if you will stay close to My side.

We thought she was last, when God spoke a new name
"Dream Bigger, " He said as her picture came
Her heart was broken but He made sure
She was healed, loved and carried to American shore.

With six precious children, we were sure we were done
But God said, "not yet, there is another one"
"A son this time, I need you to love.
I need him to know of his Father above."

So we opened the home God so graciously gave
and brought home a son, ours to love and to raise
And as He had promised, our hands He held tight
He gave us the courage, the wisdom, the might.

"Dream bigger!" He said, "I'm holding you still"
"There is yet another. Will you bow to my Will?"
"Dream bigger!" He called, gently squeezing our hands
And trembling, we submitted to His perfect plan

To a new country this time, a boy precious and sweet
needed joy, love and laughter, his needs we could meet
Was eight enough after this little one?
"Dream bigger" God said, "You still are not done!"

Across the Sea, a little girl waits
To come safely home should be her fate
“Will you be her parents even though you've not planned
For a family so large? Will you trust in My plan?"

And though it is far exceeding our plans
We will once again travel to a far off land
For a child is waiting for a family of her own
and we rejoice as we watch God's plan unfold

If we’d clung to the dreams that were ‘ours’ to hold tight
Forfeited His Grace, His Strength and His Might,
What blessings we’d miss, what opportunities lost
If our short-sighted eyes only looked at the cost.

His plans so much bigger…His ways so divine
“You’re just a small part,” He whispers so kind.
“My ways are not yours, Mine are far above all.”
Our hearts pound in awe as we hear His call.

We cannot outgive Him, He always provides
Our abilities short, in Him we abide
We’ve no choice but to lean on His loving arm
His faithfulness our refuge, our shield from all harm.

With great joy and awe we would like to introduce you to:

Zoey Faith Yong waiting for Mommy and Daddy in Henan China
Expected arrival home: Hopefully fall of 2008

Holiday Happenings

My aunt and uncle came to visit Sunday with a gift for our girls. My aunt brought dolls and hand-made doll clothes for them that she had made. They are so beautiful. The girls have been having a ball with them!


All lined up for a photo

Sunday, we managed to get all the kids dressed in their Chinese silks in honor of Chinese New Year. We were a bit late, but last Sunday, some of the kids were sick. The girls insisted that Jake needed to be dressed in Chinese clothes, too. (I think he ended up looking more like a Spanish matador...but oh well!)


Valentine's Day: Ryan has a girlfriend now, but he's broke. He had high hopes of taking his beloved out for dinner, but Mom and Dad wouldn't cough up the dough, so they had to dine with the family. The girls and I decided to try to make it special, so we decorated the table with paper hearts and candles. When we lit the candles, Molly told Ryan that we were trying to make the night, "romantical." Too funny!

Saturday Musings...

I am home today with only half of my family. Jeff, Jillian and Molly went out of town to celebrate with his parents on their 50th Wedding Anniversary!!! Congratulations to Mom and Dad on 50 years together!!



Oldest son, Ryan, went to a Christian camp this weekend, so it's just Taylor, and the four youngest kids home with Mom this weekend. We are all sick except Taylor, so we are just hanging out on the couch. Well, I'm on the couch--the kids seem to have the same level of energy no matter how sick they are.

I watch these little munchkins running around (and Jake cleaning his bowl of applesauce with his face--ugh), and I still can't believe that God has blessed me with them. How did I get to be their Mom? I look into their sparkling eyes and am in awe of where God has brought them...from humble beginnings to citizens of the greatest country on earth. What a picture of what He has done for me...and I get to see it lived out daily in front of my eyes.

The face of innocence...NOT!

Little Jake has become Dennis the Menace--but much cuter of course. :) Oh my goodness...the kid is EVERYTWHERE! Jeff calls him 'Roomba' because he grazes constantly and finds the most miniscule of food particles (and non-food particles) and puts them in his mouth. I find plastic beads in his diaper on a weekly basis. He is learning at a rapid pace and has started to mimic everything we do. He can now, 'pray' at meals, 'talk' on the phone, and 'help' Mommy unload the dishwasher. He also likes to take the trash out...sadly, he takes it out while it's still in the house, in the form of forraging for gum, food, etc. Blech--disgusting! He can do it in the blink of an eye, or when we are still cleaning up his last mess. ha Jordan is Jake's personal police officer and does his best to enforce the house rules. (He is quite often frustrated by the futility of this job--which we tried to relieve him of, to no avail.)


"Yep, I'm still doing this, but I figured how to get myself down so I don't have to yell for Mom."
Molly is having 'sleeping issues,' as she would call it. She has always had trouble with insomnia, and the only solution that has worked is for her to sleep on the floor in our room. (Yes, this DOES mean that I now have at least one child by my side 24/7! ha) When Jeff goes out of town, Molly sleeps in bed with me, and Jillian decided to sleep in Molly's spot on the floor. After several weeks, this evolved into Jillian AND Molly sleeping in our room every night. They quickly moved all their junk into our room, ie: dolls, doll clothes, homemade cardboard doll beds, and other treasures, which littered our room from one end to the other. I expressed my frustration to Jeff over this, to which he replied, "They're squatters. We'll never get them out of there! They've set up residence." I totally cracked up! All of our kids have gone through the "I need to sleep in Mommy and Daddy's room" at some point. This too shall pass.

We all have cabin fever which mean a few squabbles have erupted. Lately, SaraGrace has been saying, "Mommy, ______ is being mean to my feelings. Tell her to be nice to my feelings."
"I dressed myself today, can you tell?"

Happy Chinese New Year!

Xin Nian Kuai Le--OR--Happy New Year!!! February 5th is the start of Chinese New Year and is a holiday that everyone in China looks forward to very much. It is a family holiday and everyone tries to 'go home' for time with family. I received some adorable pictures of 'my' foster care kids the other day and thought I would share them. They brought a huge smile to my face as I saw proud foster parents showing off their little ones, all wearing brightly colored, traditional Chinese outfits. They are so cute--and Dr. Joyce Hill said it was a Herculean effort to get them to sit still enough for a photo! How awesome to know that these precious ones have a family to celebrate with! We are so grateful to our foster parents who give of themselves so selflessly.

MY LITTLE BUDDY, NICHOLAS

Sweet Matthew needs a sponsor if you are interested. Sponsorship is $35 per month with the sponsor receiving a report every other month.

Something you don't see every day....

Jordan has been filling up a backpack lately with trucks, blocks and all other toys that he wants to hoard and keep his siblings from touching. It is quite comical to see him lugging the thing all over the house. The other day, he fell over, rolled onto his back and then couldn't get up due to the weight of the backpack. I snapped a few pictures before I helped him back to his feet.


I'VE FALLEN AND I CAN'T GET UP!!!

Our oldest son, Ryan, decided to try riding a bull at a local rodeo a few weeks ago. YES, it was a REAL bull. And yes, I DID watch, signed the release...and prayed a lot. He stayed on for 3.15 seconds and didn't hurt himself. I took video but am waiting for pictures from my Mom who also watched. I do have this one shot of the 'cowboy' before he rode.

Sometimes Silence isn't Golden

My friend, Amy, sent this email to me today with a quote by Martin Luther King, Jr:

"The day our lives begin to end is the day we remain silent about things that matter."
With Amy's permission, I share what she wrote:
"It sure is easier to remain silent, isn't it? It sure is easier to live in our comfortable homes and think that the most important issue of the day is where we want to go out to eat that night or whether we can get our kids to soccer practice on time. It sure is easy to not think outside our own little space. Does it matter that millions of children around the world live every single day without a mother or father to care for them? Does it matter that so many orphaned children with medical needs don't have access to the health care that could improve their lives? Does it matter that many are unable to go to public school? Or that they go to bed each night feeling that their special need might define them for the rest of their lives? I think those who love children would say it matters greatly.

Let's not keep silent about the things that matter..... all these precious children who need love. I hope everyone whose life has been touched by the miracle of adoption chooses to be vocal and encourages those around them to consider building a family in this wonderful way. Those of us who track the waiting children lists often watch child after child have their adoption files returned without being chosen. I looked up the opposite of "chosen" online, and the word that I saw made me cringe. Did you know the opposite of chosen is "rejected?" What an awful word that is.

It is a sad reality that thousands of children around the world each year are abandoned. We all wish that wasn't the case. But for many... there is still hope. The staff in their orphanages who care for them prepare their files and send them forward with the hope of a new family. But for some, particularly the boys....no one ever comes forward. The time goes by and their files are returned without being chosen. The hope of a family is gone.

Right now on so many great agency lists....there are children who are waiting and who have not been chosen. It is hard to believe that with millions of potential parents in the United States, that there isn't a family for every child who shows up on an adoption list. We know adoption is expensive. We know it is most definitely a leap of faith. But all of us at LWB believe completely that every child born deserves to know what it really means to be loved. And when there is a will to become a parent, there is almost always a way....whether it is through domestic adoption or international.

Let's not keep silent about the fact that so many orphaned children are waiting for homes. There are so many waiting right now for a family to choose them for their own.

Help spread the news that so many kids are waiting for homes. You never know....the person you tell might have been praying that very day for a way to become a parent. The majority of people around us have absolutely no idea that so many children wait. Let's not be silent....because every child on this earth truly does matter."

Focus on the Family

Yesterday, Focus on the Family had a broadcast on adoption. Some friends of ours were interviewed (their story is last). If you missed the program, you can hear it online at: http://www.oneplace.com/Ministries/Focus_on_the_Family/Archives.asp?bcd=2008-1-10

You might not think we are so crazy after you hear other people's stories. :) Seriously, though, it again brought tears to my eyes as I contemplate that God knows the name of every orphan in the world--all 143 million of them--and He is aware of their suffering. He has given all of us the job of caring for them in some way, and what a privilege that is.

I had many thoughts surrounding Christmas that I wanted to share, but I got sick and couldn't write. Now I have forgotten what I was going to say. haha...must have been profound. :)

I have had a few amusing moments with the kids the past few days, though. Little Jake keeps us on our toes every minute. He is into everything and very curious. Two mornings ago, I heard blood-curdling screams coming from his room. This usually means he has gotten a chubby leg stuck in the railing of his crib. I went up to rescue him but started cracking up when I saw the reason for his great distress. He had tried to hike a leg over the railing, between the wall and the crib, and he was stuck on TOP of the railing, straddling it precariously, and screaming at the top of his lungs. Now, one would think that this traumatic experience would teach him not to do it again. The following morning....yes....I again hear the same screams. This time I took the camera and got this shot of his morning escapades.


Yesterday, I took the girls to Hobby Lobby and as we were checking out, the check-out lady asked SaraGrace what her name was. SaraGrace told her, and then said, 'Waths you name?" The lady told her, "Marsha." SaraGrace wrinkled up her nose in confusion and said loudly, "Why thomeone name you Marshmallow?" The whole line behind me cracked up as I wanted to disappear into the floor. Thankfully, "Marshmallow" was very gracious and said, 'My name is MarshA, but when I was a little girl, I was called Marshmallow." I love that girl--but I would like to put a muzzle on her sometimes!

Nicholas

Through my work for Love Without Boundaries, I see pictures of orphaned children in China nearly every day. They are all so precious and since the children in my foster care program are all special needs, they each have overcome great odds to be where they are. Sometimes, though, there is one special child who grabs my heart and causes me to root just a little bit harder for him or her. Currently, that special little one is Nicholas.

Sweet little Nicholas is not yet a year old and he is not destined to live to be very old. He was born with a congenital heart problem that is so severe that it is inoperable. He is in palliative care through LWB and Hope Healing Home in Beijing.

I receive reports on the children every other month and each time, I eagerly open Nicholas' first. He is always smiling. This little boy has such a joy about him. He looks at me though his photo and I can almost imagine him winking at me. His adorable smile seems to say, "Look at me! I have been given another day and I will choose to spend it happily!" He doesn't let his heart condition hold him back from enjoying each day. He has much to complain about, but he chooses not to.

What an inspiration this little boy is to me! He did not have the privileges that I have been given....to be born to parents who had the means to care for him...to be born in a country that would have been able to pay for the health care he needed. He doesn't know what it feels like to take a breath without struggling for it, or what his skin would look like if it wasn't a deathly blue pallor. He will probably never have the strength to run and play like the other children. And yet, little Nicholas' life is so full of joy and purpose. His life speaks volumes to those around him as he teaches us to be thankful for our health, our families, and our material blessings. He teaches us to care for those who have no parents and those who have special needs. I have heard many people ask why a loving God would allow such suffering, but when I see the results, I can see that suffering is never capricious or purposeless. Each time I speak to someone who is assisting a child or person less fortunate, I can't help wondering who is being blessed more...the person being helped, or the person helping. The sparkle in the eyes of the helper, cements the belief that giving brings much more happiness than receiving. We are given the opportunity to live outside of ourselves and GIVE hope and support and I believe that God also gives extra peace and comfort to those who are suffering.

Thankfully, through foster care and a very dear woman who is willing to give her heart to orphans that are dying, little Nicholas DOES know what it feels like to have arms around him. He DOES know what it feels like to have someone love him.

Thank you, Nicholas, for letting your life be an example for the rest of us...for letting your shining eyes tell us of your great spirit and will to live joyfully in the face of incredible odds.

Snowbound

What do Midwesterners do when they get a lot of snow? For those of you who live in warm climates, I thought I'd put a few pictures on the blog. Church was cancelled yesterday and today school is cancelled, so the kids have been having fun in the snow!
First, the men work on the snowblower for hours trying to get it started, and when it does....This is Ryan handling the snow.

Little brother, Jordan, watches Ryan and Daddy from the window. The snow is too deep for Jordan to play in.

The girls played in the big piles of snow that Daddy shoveled after the snowblower quit working AGAIN.
The girls came in all bedraggled and freezing cold... ...and decided to play dress-up instead.
Taylor takes a break in front of the fire...

Our budding actress

From the day she has been in our arms, SaraGrace has put all of her considerable acting talents to good use. She has always cracked us up. In fact, as I was starting to type this, she stood next to me with notebook and pen and asked me, "What is your name, my dear?" in her most theatrical voice.

The kids have been watching a Little Rascals movie lately (over and over ad nauseum). There is a scene were Alfalfa, Darla (the girl he is 'sweet' on), and an interloper boy are all involved in a talent show. Both boys are trying to impress Darla. Molly loves to sing and I heard her singing the song the other day. It sounded like SaraGrace was also involved so I peeked around the corner. SaraGrace was imitating Darla and Molly was singing to her. They wouldn't do their 'act' while I was watching, so Jillian taped it for me. I uploaded it to YouTube if you want to see it. It's a bit rough--Molly was mumbling the words because she was embarrassed, but SaraGrace's dancing is hysterical. (At least we think so!!)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=k2byNTB9pM8
At least they weren't tobogganing down the stairs on a crib mattress today....

We have had two birthday's since I last wrote...Little Miss Chloe turned five and a few days later, Jeff turned 48. Since our kids--led by Molly--love the Red Robin jingle (ie: Red Robin....YUM!), we decided to try it out for Chloe's birthday. Grandma and Grandpa joined us and I think everyone had fun. :)

I am trying to adjust to the cold weather and having the kid's inside all day. They have so much energy and sometimes they just need to run. It makes for a very LOUD household on the days that they cannot go outside to blow off steam. Today is one of those days--it's freezing rain outside. Earlier today,they tried riding a crib mattress down the stairs--hmmmmm. I guess sliding down in their sleeping bags lost it's luster from the other day. Thankfully, no one got hurt before I put a stop to it! (I remember as a kid telling myself that someday, when I had kids, I WOULD let them slide down the stairs in sleeping bags...haha)

We are in full swing preparing for Christmas. The kids are soooo excited! SaraGrace wanted to know what the fuss was all about--was it someone's birthday? We said, 'Yes, it's Jesus' birthday!" She looked at me seriously and said, "For real or for fake?"

For real.

Jesus really DID come as a tiny baby--not with trumpets announcing a King. He came quietly and not many knew. But now we know...and we celebrate with grateful hearts.

Our 25th Annversary

THEN....
Today is our 25th wedding anniversary! How is that possible?! We are amazed at how fast the years have flown by. God has been so incredibly faithful to us all these years and we are so thankful for the ways He has blessed us!

Never in our wildest dreams would we have thought He would take us to Oklahoma, China and Guatemala for our children--or that He would take us there so many times!! We are so grateful for all He has done for us.


Thought you might get a kick out of these wedding pictures...we sure did! Our kids have looked at them over and over the past few days and decided that we looked 'wierd' back then. :) I'm sure the circa 1982 "Princess Diana" bridesmaid dresses will take you back. ha.

And now....

Family update

Time continues to slip by me and many of these blog entries are written in my head and then never make it to the blog. Oh well....

SaraGrace has had a birthday since I last wrote--how can she be FOUR already? That morning, she came downstairs in a Chinese silk dress, several sizes too big, and announced that she would be the wearing it in honor of her 'happy birthday.' She actually wore it all day, which is remarkable since she normally has more wardrobe changes per day than a Hollywood starlet. She celebrated in true SaraGrace style--big smiles and lots of exitement (aka: drama).




Jeff and I recently stumbled onto a TV show called "John and Kate plus Eight." It follows a real family who has eight children, a set of twins and a set of septuplets. Jeff says he loves to watch this show to see chaos in other people's homes. haha The father is Korean and the children all look Asian, which makes the show much more endearing to us. We noticed that the TV crew only seems to tape the family getting ready to go on an outing--as well as getting ready for the outing. We crack up at this because we mostly stay HOME because taking the kids anywhere is such an undertaking--partly because it is hard to keep track of everyone and we are constantly counting heads. However, we did feel a bit inspired to take them somewhere once in a while.

We live in a small town that has a Christmas event in early November. They have a Christmas walk and all the little shops are open, and the shop windows are decorated for Christmas. At 7PM, they light all the trees lining the main street. It's a fun event that we missed last year because we were just home from China and totally jet-lagged. So off we went to this year's event. We counted down out loud with the other townsfolk for the 7PM lighting, and walked around looking at the Christmas displays. We finished up with some wonderful hot chocolate at the Daily Grind and then one more peek at the Doll Cottage before heading home. Our big boys opted not to come and poor little Jordan had to stay home because he was sick. I had forgotten what a novelty our family is when we all go out together. Too funny to hear the comments of some people whose depth perception is a bit off and think we don't hear them. "Why look at that, Martha...they have two sets of twins and a baby boy." HUH??!! Jake's first time in winter clothes, which make him as wide as he is tall.
"Mmmmm...Yummy hot chocolate"



We were on a roll, so later that weekend when Ryan asked all of us to go bowling, we thought we'd give it a try while the little boys were napping. Taylor stayed home to babysit and we all headed over to the bowling alley where they were having a smoke-free day. What a hoot! The girls had their own bumper lane and they actually did pretty well. SaraGrace was the queen of spares because somehow, she always managed to hit those few remaining pins and knock them over. She would then jump up and down squealing, "YAY!!! YAY!!!" There was a teenage girl next to us who told her boyfriend to make sure he watched her when she 'bowled." Jeff and Ryan were slightly mortified at our girlish enthusiasm, but we girls had fun jumping up and down and cheering for each other.




Now all the kids have colds so I guess we will stay home for awhile and not share the gift of germs with anyone.

Happy Gotcha Day, Jordan!

It's hard to believe that one year ago today we walked into the Civil Affairs office in Taiyuan China. We went up the stairs and into the same room where we received SaraGrace the year before. There, sitting on the couch, were two sweet little boys waiting for their new Mom's and Dad's. They were dressed alike and looked very scared at what was happening. They were both quickly swept up into the arms of their new parents, and new lives were started.
Jordan, with Mommy and Daddy in China

Caleb, with his new Mommy and Daddy in China

One year later, Jordan is blossoming. He is still a quiet little guy with a huge appetite, but he has started talking, building amazing block structures and riding a bike with training wheels. He is a wonderful big brother to little brother, Jake, and a sweet 'baby' brother to his doting big sisters.

Happy Gotcha Day, sweet Jordan! You are a blessing to our family.

Jakey is taking his first steps!

Our tiny little guy is starting to take his first steps! It is so cute. He grins at all of us first before he starts. I think we are getting him too used to having an adoring audience to cheer his every accomplishment. haha He first looks around to make sure everyone is watching and then with a big grin, starts off. He takes the smallest steps I have ever seen a baby take. It is so funny. He also takes the fastest steps I have ever seen--much like the way he crawls--in hyperdrive. He has such tiny feet, I don't know how he can balance himself on them.

He will look so funny when he is walking full time because he is so small. He is only wearing 9 month clothing but he has a full head of hair which confuses a lot of people who try to guess his age.

He has added a new word to his repertoire..."yuck." He can say Mama, Dada, Uh-oh, and yuck. ha Whenever he has a poopy diaper and I start to change him, he says, 'Yuck." Hmmm...I guess I must say that more than I realize!

Happy Gotcha Day, SaraGrace!

Two years ago today, the most adorable little spitfire was placed in our arms. She was none to happy about it at first, but before very long, this amazing little fighter embraced us with the same tenacity that had helped her survive her first year of life. The only reminder of that difficult first year is the scar on her chest from her heart surgery. She has brought incredible joy and fun to our lives and quite a lot of mischief!

Happy Gotcha Day, SaraGrace. You are forever treasured.

Brief update on baby Sinh

I don't have a whole lot to report, but Sinh is currently undergoing tests in a French Hospital in Hanoi. They are not very optimistic, but they are giving her some medication to strengthen her and her heart for the surgery. The adoption agency director said, 'I think we are running out of time. Please keep her in your prayers."